If I lost enough weight I could walk. Of course I’d also be dead.
Before I start the tangent that this post is officially about, I need to sort this out. I go to physical therapy twice a week now. But I’m not sure what to call it. Yes, physical therapy, got that part. But is it the PT office? No, that would be silly. Studio? Gym? Those are wrong, too. I ended up googling for the answer. Physical therapists practice in hospitals, outpatient clinics, and private offices that have specially equipped facilities. Um, okay. I’m clearly not going to a hospital or a clinic, so it must be that last one.
So at the private office that I go to with the specially equipped facility (nope, still doesn’t sound right) they have an anti-gravity treadmill.You put on a pair of special shorts that have a zipper at the top, then you step onto the treadmill, and they pull up what I keep referring to as the inflatable tutu, though now that I think about it, it looks nothing at all like a tutu, and more like a plastic bubble, as though the lower half of my body can’t survive if it is exposed to germs. So then you are zipped to the tutu/life saving sterile environment, and the machine starts filling with air. The air pressure floats you off the ground.
Well, not entirely off the ground. You program in how much of your body weight you want supported. Except for this one time two weeks ago, when the machine misfired (due to me being handed the wrong sized shorts which were to big and allowed the air to leak out) and I was pulled about six inches off the ground. Which did get my heart racing.
But what is supposed to happen, and in fact normally happens is you plug in your number, and suddenly you experience altered gravity on your feet. And you can walk and stand and feel oh so much taller than you do sitting in the chair.
Which is how I know that if I lost 60% of my body weight I’d be able to walk now.
But, since I’m not a candidate for the biggest loser, if I l lost that much I wouldn’t be walking for different reasons. The skeleton alone is almost 15% of the average human body weight, and I’m pretty sure I need more than 25% of my body weight for things like organs and blood.
So while I’d like to lose some weight, pound loss isn’t going to be enough to get me on my feet again.
And actually, odds are the pounds aren’t going anywhere until my feet are able to walk them off.